1. We Salute You Dr. Carter !
    AMAZING Insight. Brilliant Analysis + Outstanding Emotional Self-Defense Tactician !
    Helping us go from Surviving, To Thriving; Thank You.

    In Jesus Christ's Love Always Be Encouraged_Psalm 23

    Jesus Is The Way +

  2. Hi Dr Carter. Thank you for your videos & your compassionate take on Narcissists. I love someone who is a narcissist. It really troubles me that the general consensus seems to be that we should just "throw them away". These are people who were damaged as children~ they really have little or no way of coping with life. (i suffer from BPD & know how difficult it is to rewire your brain after childhood trauma has completely messed up your perception of reality at a very young age). These are human beings who are trying to cope with severe brokenness ~ they are not monsters or demons. In your opinion ~ should we just walk away from them & leave them to their own devices? Is it a complete waste of time to try & give them some form of love by learning to understand why they behave the way they do? In short do you believe that one can have a relationship with them without getting completely incinerated?

  3. I’m actually truly marveled that all the descriptions in this channel describe my father so well. Of course he throws a tantrum and just vanishes if people suggest he needs psychological support, so I guess we all have to diagnose the narcs in our lives indirectly.

  4. Then again, they are spared of the suffering of knowing who they really are because it is so lost, so out of reach for them. So there is really no reason to pity, just knowing how to cope.
    My father is a narc, was bullied by my grandfather from an early age, always being physically and verbally humiliated and controlled. Perhaps it runs in the family?
    As for me, took me a long time to realize the expectations I had for him as a father were just not true. “Someday”, he often says, “I will do this and that for you and your life will be great, you will never have to worry”. It’s been 30 years…
    I’m in No Contact, last time he approached I could smell a rat and was right – he was trying to approach me, make me think I needed him, to get into my house to live here under false pretenses. And control my life, of course, be the king he thinks he is. The good news is, the older he gets, the less energy he has for mind games.

  5. Oh my God I think I might be a narcissist! I was with one or I thought I was I really didn't feel like this before I was with her I've got some of those traits now. Crap what do I do?

  6. Watching this again, I had to laugh as I listened to #12 and #13. This week, a malignant family narc whom I went no contact with about six months ago sent a cop out to my house under the guise of doing a “wellness” (or whatever it’s called ) check. The narc lives two thousand miles away from me. I went out to get my newspaper and there’s this squad car and this officer who tells me, “Call your cousin so and so. He’s worried.” It was surreal. A cop showing up at my house and talking to me like a Jewish mother. I ended up not calling so the narc then moved on to calling my brother whom he hasn’t spoken to in twenty-five years. Trust me, the narc couldn’t give a damn about how I am but I was an excellent source of supply until I decided to walk away from all the psychological and verbal abuse. Posting this to underscore how they will stop at nothing to get you reinvested in them when you go no contact. This narc, by the way, is a physician. When I think about how well he must have faked being a concerned relative I get sick to my stomach.

  7. problem is there are alot of these traits that some people will do in heat of the moment , and falsely be thought of s a narcassist in the others persons mind , Just becaue they happen to be there , when that person who normally wouldn't but did that day , show a sign or two that match these. Its a false positive lol. lots of ppl watch these clips and somehow think they've turned into experts , and labelling people left right and center , spreading rumor and unqualitified conclusions . You can say correlation is not causation a million times , but it takes active mind to analyze , disect , research , study etc … most people ain't putting that effort in . So lets be cautious with this info

  8. All of these are so on point! I was asking my ex to cooperate by not interrupting me, he refused to take responsibility for it (input not received), pondered on whether I was punishing him for something he'd done (paranoia), said my feelings were unfounded and irrational (lack of empathy), called the whole relationship off before I could (fear of rejection), and his last message said: "You win" (competition vs. cooperation).

  9. That is the best information I got anywhere so far about Ns. Discovering these truths will actually really come in handy in my life ! And there is at least 75 Narcissists that didn't like this post so that is the best proof for me that the information given really struck a cord ! ! !

  10. My Narc just recently cheated on me! Didn't confess till busted. Changes his confessions on almost a daily. I learn new stuff about the awful stuff he's done! But then the next day says he never said that! It is maddening!!!!! Always shifts the blame on to me somehow!!! Then brings up stuff I've done 20yrs ago as a teen, way before we were married!! He always makes them WAY worse than they really were N adds on lies! I'm in the process of getting help for my CPTSD N creating an escape plan! Thank you, Excellent vid! He always goes for desperate pleaser women! Then gets tired of and/or bored with the hand n foot doormats. I will ABSOLUTELY NOT be there to pick up the pieces this time. I value marriage but my sanity is way more important now!!!

  11. Yeah. He comes back with a vengeance and I'll be like that kid in the movies Home Alone and home Alone 2 on a holiday! "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!"

  12. You nailed it! I almost drove myself into the ground trying yo get the narc to work with me and be open. Then I leaned the hard way they're insulted us even suggesting it. They're irreparably broken. Most anyway.

  13. It helped to consciously redefine the relationship as simply mutual need satisfaction. He doesn't get another chance at my heart. He makes a living, I make dinner. It's lonely, but I know I could and should do more to find and develop friendships and interests apart from him. It is nice to have the paycheck taken care of, but….it's lonely.

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